In the Land of the Living

There are verses I know up in my head because I’ve read them many times, and then there are seasons when those same words sink in and land with a soft thud of reality in my heart.

This year has held more change and heartache than I expected. Some things have been deeply disappointing. Some have been painful in ways I am still sorting through with the Lord. There have been goodbyes I did not anticipate, relationships that changed, and moments when I have had to bring my thoughts back, again and again, to what I know is true.

“I will see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living.”

Sometimes it has been through His Word, open in front of me at just the right time and sometimes it has been something as ordinary as walking outside and looking up.

A sky like this stops me.

The color, the clouds, the light spreading across everything. The hills going dark against the evening sky. Creation simply declaring what has always been true. God is so faithful and so good.

I have needed that reminder this year.

Psalm 27 was written from a place where David knew fear, opposition, loneliness, and uncertainty.
“…When the wicked advance against me
    to devour me…”

Yet right there in the middle of all of it is this confidence: I will see the goodness of the LORD.

I am learning to say that with him, “I will see…”

I’ve already seen His goodness, actually…in prayers answered in unexpected ways, in beginnings that I’d never have chosen if it were up to me, in Scripture becoming real – moving from my head to my heart and even to my hands in a way, and in peace – the same peace Paul describes that “surpasses understanding.”

I’m thankful for that peace. I’m glad it surpasses understanding too. How empty is a peace that I can just grasp. What a difference to have peace that is beyond me. I’m thankful this peace doesn’t depend on my being able to explain why I have it.

There’ve been circumstances this year that could easily have occupied every thought – ok, sometimes they did – but the Lord has reminded me that I don’t have to understand everything in order to trust Him. I don’t have to know how every part of the story will resolve before I can be grateful for the goodness already in front of me.

Today the reminder of the goodness of God came from just taking in a sunset. What a simple everyday sort of reminder, and yet, tonight it felt so big and not so every day.

Earlier there was a poke at my heart that hurt and brought up the sting of hurt again but looking out and up to see the soft pink clouds expanding toward the northern horizon seemed to swallow up that sting and soften it into the gentle reminder (again) that I will see – am seeing – the goodness of God now, in the “land of the living.”

Some things will not get resolved in the land of the living and I sigh and can feel the sadness about that, but I will see the goodness of God in spite of the unresolved things.

“I will see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living.”

I believe that and I can let the rest go and keep seeing Him and His goodness.

P.S. This Psalm is especially fresh in my heart because I spent so much time in it earlier this year while writing Chill. I studied it deeply, wrote through it, taught from it, and then had the joy of walking through it with women in the Dwelling Richly community this summer.

And this is exactly why I keep coming back to the idea that we dwell, not just do. Time in the Word has a way of storing truth in us. Psalm 27 didn’t feel like something I had to go looking for in this moment. It was already there, familiar and alive in my mind, strengthening me and grounding me again in what I know is true about God.

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